Ali & Lissette Gonzalez — True Colorblind Love!

Lissette Torres was experiencing an emptiness in her life that accompanied the passing of her beloved father.  Lissette felt that God (with the help of her father) eased her suffering by sending her an angel for comfort.  That angel would end up being her true love and soul mate Ali.  Extremely happy in her close, loving and almost 13 year strong marriage; Lissette and Ali put family first and immensely enjoy watching their two children grow and learn.  Lissette faithfully applies 3 tenets passed on to her by her father in a dream —- Love, Respect and Communication.  These tenets are naturally colorblind and so is their love.

What is your husband’s ethnicity?

Ali is Cuban American

How did you meet?

We met at a local bar (Hooligans) it was the best!

And how long had you known him when you got married?

Within 3 months of meeting, Ali proposed to me.  A year and one month later, we we were married.

When were you married?

August 23 1997

Was this your first interracial relationship?

No. I have always been attracted to the Italian looking men with the dark features whoooo!! It was not unusual for me since my family consists of a vast array of ethnicities.  I am a black Cuban American.

How did you feel about interracial marriage and relationships before you were in one?

I have never been critical of people as far as love or race goes. My mother told me that we were all the same and although you can have a type of person you like, the heart is what makes you fall in love. It is logical not hard at all to understand.

Do you feel any different about interracial marriage and relationships now?

I think it is more accepted in society but I still feel there are many  hypocrites out there.  I of course am speaking from my own personal experiences.

Did you face skeptics and criticism from friends and/or family about your interracial marriages?

Yes

Do you recall how you first informed your friends and family of your interracial relationship and subsequent marriage?

Yes, they told me to stay away from him, but not truly for the interracial aspect.  It was because Ali was known as a ladies’ man.  To me, he was the perfect gentleman.  That’s what got me then and that’s what gets me now!

What about your husband’s family —- did you or he face any criticism from them?

Well…. (Pause)  Yes, but they changed their outlook very quickly. In fact, it was almost immediate.  They realize that they were being ignorant.

How was it handled?

Nothing was done on our part as I couldn’t care less; but they put forth the effort and came to us.  Everything played out perfectly.  I do give God the credit.  God is good!!!

Have you ever felt pressure or experienced a significant difference between your non interracial and interracial relationships?

No pressure but yes there was a societal difference. I didn’t get as many stares as when I was with my black boyfriends.  I guess that would be the only difference.

Do you feel that there are societal criticisms and pressures concerning interracial relationships in the US?

No not really. hmmmm (pondering) Well, I’ll have to think about that one more.  It just depends on the individual. Everyone has their own perception and or/opinions about interracial relationships.

Do you have children?

Yes, we have lovely kids. a boy and girl.

Does race figure into child rearing for you?

Yes.

When and if your children first experience racism, what do you think your advice will be to him/her/them?

Since my children especially my daughter was very white when born she thought she was white.  I heard her say it when she was four years-old.  It was at that moment I explained to my daughter her ethnic (black and Latino) heritage and she understood perfectly.  I told my daughter that she was biracial. She’s very proud.  To my son, race has not yet become an issue but when it does, we/they will be prepared.

Where do you live?

Sunny Isles Beach Florida

Do you think Sunny Isles Beach Florida in general is a good place for interracial couples and families?

I have not had any bad experiences here. Miami Florida is a melting pot of cultures and if anything, it is one of the best places for an interracial family to live.

What do you do for fun?

We are a very vibrant couple that has lots of fun.  I sing Karaoke while my husband sits with a drink in his hand and admires my show. We enjoy hanging out with friends for dinner and cocktails. We have a theme party at least once a month. (Cinco de Mayo is coming up (smiling).  We adore spending family day (Sundays) together.  We and the children enjoy the pool and have lots of fun.

On a romantic note, Ali and I love relaxing at home, cuddling cosy, while peering out from our ”beach view” every night.  We admire the moonlit reflections on my feet as we dance and fly around the world as the city sleeps…. Awwww (smiling) I love being home.

Do you have any suggestions for black women just entering interracial relationships?

Remember, there are no reservations when you fall in love. It is what it is.  Do not let the world dictate your life should be and what makes you happy. Everyone encounters negativity in their life, so no matter what the reason, go for what you want and fight the world for what you believe.  True love is colorblind.

Thank you!