Filed under: Black Women | Tagged: Black Women, dating, getting stood up, Houdini dates, liars, love, manipulators, mirages, romance, time stealers, timewasters
Expect Better…Live Better!
***ATTENTION!!! CW Asks For A Favor****
PLEASE if at all possible, refrain from debating with factions on other sites (Topix, YouTube, BV, BP, etc)...This gets us nowhere and distracts from our purpose which is living the best life possible...Some BW are bogged down by frequently arguing with folks who are irrelevant...Do not expend ANYMORE energy into this...Cease trying to convince anyone to see the situation in a different light...Either these people (Black, White, or otherwise) get it or they DON'T!...The parties who want to keep Black women on a hamster wheel often try to taunt us into "debate" in order to preoccupy...If you're on a messageboard debating then you're not:
1. Going out and meeting people
2. Dating
3. Travelling
4. Learning new things
5.Connecting with a loved one
6.Watching Paint Dry...Even doing that would be more productive because that means you worked on a project...Something was painted
7.(Fill In The Blank)
Time to move on...
This forum encourages discussion, critical thinking and feedback....However I WILL NOT tolerate predator/criminal protectionism...Those who engage in this will soon find this out...I participate fully with law enforcement regarding any suspicious activity, clear???
A Message To Black Women:
This is a time where enough is enough and we must act. Despite our differences in opinion on dating and messageboard posts, there is a situation staring Black women dead in the face. Love me, hate me, cuss me out and call me names...Just demand better for Black women. Add me to your blogroll, remove me, or ban me...Just stand up for Black women. The crimes committed against us are often glossed over in favor of fighting perceived injustices against Black men who are overwhelmingly found to be the perpetrators. Rev. Al & Jesse (AKA "Big Perm" & "Big Illegitimate Daddy")would rather march for the BM of "Jena 6", or cry about how a BM teen received too much prison time (Google Geranalow Wilson) for indecent acts. These phony sychophants of the "Black Community Machine" will never stand up for Black women who are the constant victims of damaged Black men. Consider the numerous BW who have become victims that we can name off the top of our heads. And believe me this list isn't all inclusive...All within less than a year:
Ms Esmin Green, who was left to die on a hospital floor. People from her family, church, etc came out of the woodwork only AFTER she died. IMO...True fashion of those who did not do right by her in the first place...Now these parties want to go on the news and prostrate themselves on Ms Green's coffin...Where were they while she was alive?...It was obvious she needed help...More than likely she was just another 'mule' fitting under the 'Strong Black Woman' profile...Again, not to mention Jesse or Al...WHERE WERE THEY???Sisters, we MUST reject being a burden bearer and only deal with those who reciprocate...
Daniyah Jackson
Nailah Franklin
Latasha Norman
The two mothers & babies gunned down in Indianapolis
Dunbar Village
Alexis Goggins
Stepha Henry
Sgt. Jan Pawel Pietrzak and his wife, Quiana Pietrzak
There are no marches, committees nor protests for these atrocities committed against Black women. When will we cease giving endless support to a false community which openly (with misogynist music), or with silence, endorse cruelty against us?
We cannot go on pretending the so called Black "leadership"
has our best interests at heart. The rare occasions "Black leadership" has shown their face for BW is where there is a possibility of playing the racecard. Black women must cease and desist any support of
these organizations and their figureheads...
-If the reader wishes not to have their photos or blog on this site...email me and i will be more than happy to remove it -Please report any dead or otherwise irrelevant linx
Questions and/or concerns?
thecwexperience(nospammy)@hotmail.com-
Readers Talk Back!
MsMellody on Repost: Pauly & Vanes… Pamela on Repost: Pauly & Vanes… Shana on Repost: Pauly & Vanes… sky on Video Blurb: Rhianna’s I… The Star Blazer on Paula Patton Infanticipating/M… Lorraine on On A Lighter Note: Alain Wong … ann on Paula Patton Infanticipating/M… ann on Paula Patton Infanticipating/M… ann on Paula Patton Infanticipating/M… Velour on Blurb: The Verseveldt’s … Velour on Paula Patton Infanticipating/M… Jamdown on Paula Patton Infanticipating/M… C W on Blurb: The Verseveldt’s … C W on Blurb: The Verseveldt’s … C W on Sad But Touching 1 Year Annive… -
This is where we have to call God in, he knows everyone the liars, cheaters etc and the no-showers up. Ask him, to show us the liars etc, so that we don’t waste our time. The young lady will get a good man and as for him, the cockroaches will get him.
Dag CW —this is awful and I know it goes on ALL the time. *sigh*
I just recently been through something similar.
BTW, CW, I just pruchased your book, can’t wait ot read it!! *Cheezing*
I’m sorry, but I know a lot of women who lie, lead guys on for free drinks and dinners and stand guys up too. It’s wrong when both genders do it, but to portray it as a man thing is just untrue. Women lead men on all the time as well.
Phantom Mare…
Thanx…and I certainly hope u enjoy!
You’re welcome CW!
T, I believe the woman in the video mentioned that it goes both ways. She even asks for response from men on that point. But what she was going off of is that her friend of hers, it sounds had just gone through a situation and was it addressing from that angle.
I’m thinking that some just don’t want us to discuss anything…Unless it’s to toot others horn’s or participate in self-loathing…
I’m thinking that some just don’t want us to discuss anything…Unless it’s to toot others horn’s or participate in self-loathing…
—————————
For real!! that’s why I say any sort of dialouge is pointless.
CW, where you do get your book from?
Thanks in advance
My question is: Why would you invite a man to spend the weekend in your own home that you merely talked to after just four months via email and telephone calls? Thank goodness this man never showed up. He was a stranger. I don’t care if you speak on the telephone and have these amazing conversations. Nothing can replace getting to know a person through offline communication. Why did they jump from emails and phone calls to spending the weekend in her home? This man could have been Ted Bundy, and obviously she didn’t know him well enough. The fact is, he was a stranger, an acquaintance she had good chemistry with. This got confused with a special connection.
The best and safest scenario would have been to let him come to her home town and he could have stayed in a hotel while they meet up in public places and get to know each other offline and no sex. I think it was downright dangerous what she did. She was moving too fast; most likely they would have slept together had he stayed at her house. And she was willing to do this after four months of talking to someone she has never met in person? Ladies you deserve more than this. Take the time to know a man in person.
I hope this doesn’t turn into how she was merely victimized. I really hope she can do some introspection of her own behavior.
Jaz…
You are absolutely right…I hope that this friend was going to follow normal safety precautions…But since a 3rd party was telling the story it may have gotten lost in the translation…Yes indeed! Ladies…Meet at a neutral POPULATED area where someone knows where you’ll be!
Felicity…
You may purchase at
barnesandnoble.com or amazon.com
and/or follow the link at the top of the page…”Black Women Deserve Better” -The Book…Thanx much!
This is weird.!
Why would you contemplate having a STRANGER stay in your house for the weekend?
It is fine to have conversations with someone etc, even for a sustained amount of time, but you still have to physically MEET someone before you decide if you can take it a step further. This woman invested too much time in a stranger, and is now allowing a stranger to dictate her emotions, because she still has not met him. This is a good thing (not meeting him) because I practically guarantee this man is a 500 pound troll who lays in bed having imaginary relationships all day long. The next time he is seen will be when the paramedics come to hoist him through the window.
When he did not show up or call on day one..it should have been a BIG CLUE. She should never have made this arrangement anyway. Let him pay for a hotel…jeez.
I don’t want to be harsh, but I am not really feeling sympathy for this “friend” of hers. She should have never put herself out there for a stranger. At least WAIT until you meet him…even after you meet someone who is a perfect match, you may find he has some qualities that you cannot get with. He has some funky teeth he never mentioned, or a weird smell, or ugly hands you don’t want to look at for the next 100 years. There are a lot of subtleties that go into chemistry..but you ALWAYS have to meet the person physically first…and then you can start to invest the (small amounts please..hold back until you know someone) emotions..not before.
OOps sorry Jaz..
I did not read your comments before I posted.
We said the same stuff almost.
I bet MISS Laurence Queens is just chomping at the bit to be able to comment..lol
Lola…
“Mr you-know-who” will not be posting here…
And to be stood up like that is awful…BUT, I hope this friend realizes she needs to keep her options open until it is committment time..
Great blog! Keep up the good work.
Please add me to your blog roll.
Whitney
I know you banned him CW, but I must confess I miss his psychotic ramblings ~ and I bet as soon as he wakes (from his cot in Grandma’s basement, instead of getting a JOB and tending to his own sorry life as opposed to worrying about women he does not know, and never will) up he rushes to read wht the “sellout” women are saying…lol
Congrats on the book CW
No problem, Lola. I don’t think the importance of meeting someone face to face and getting to know them offline can be stressed just once. It is very important.
I hear you, CW. Maybe her friend who posted the video is losing some vital information on the situation. I sure hope so, but it doesn’t look good. I hope she never puts herself in such a situation again, and can find a true and healthy relationship.
Without a doubt…Safety first…In fact..Please refer back to the past blog “Dating Safely On the ‘Internets’”
if some ideas/guidelines are needed…
Lola…Girl they are all here in ABC’s “Moderation Hell”…I gotta admit..They are a hoot!
Thanks for that CW
Hi everyone. I’m honored that my vid is up for discussion; but I’m also dismayed how we can all hear the same vid, but come away with different assumptions. Yes, my friend did invite this “stranger” to her home after several months of talking on the phone and internet and that could be a safety issue and judgement call (as some have judged), BUT NEVER once did I say that this man was STAYING or SPENDING THE NIGHT at my friend’s house. CW, you were right, this is a 3rd party account and I definitely left out many details because my point was the heartlessness of some “humans.” T, I would never bash men, I was speaking of men and women alike, it’s just that this particular incident involved a man being heartless, but I know women can be the same. Again, thanks for featuring and discussing this topic.
be blessed
Thanx so blessed…I posted the video to demonstrate to Black women especially, that they are not alone in these experiences…Safety first, but I didn’t want anyone to read more into it that what you presented…Please keep visiting
: )
Thanks. I most certainly will revisit.
I love what you’re doing for the Ladies
be blessed